Good Detective v. Bad Detective

Max Allen is Good at being a 1920's Detective:

"I'm telling you they're running hooch, booze, jazz juice, liquid fun, rocket sauce, Alcohol I tell ya!"


Sam Shear is Bad at Being a 1920's Detective:

"That story's got more holes in it than cheese, swiss chese, swiss cheese's got holes in it, it's a kind of cheese, swiss cheese!"

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I'm knee deep in NaNoWriMo and I'm resisting the urge to write about fifty of these and recording them in that voice. Just some poor bastard without the gift of gab but feeling pressured to talk like that, and just endlessly repeating the same example.

"He's running guns to mexico! Mexico, south of Texas, mexicans live there, shaped weird, mexico land, he's running there, Mexico Gun!"

I think this is probably a situation where this is incredibly funny in my head, but entirely not transferable to the written word. Good times.