Saturday, February 18, 2006


There’s a mouse in the kitchen. I call him Stanley. Stan leads a far more interesting life than I do. His job is more fulfilling than mine and his girlfriend is prettier. In fact, just that he has a girlfriend is more impressive than anything in my life. My life moves by in the springs of a second while his rolls by in the roar of a train.

We have a small agreement, Stanley and me. If he’s out of the kitchen when I’m eating dinner, I leave him be. If he shows his face while I’m there, I chase after him with my shoe and a licence to smash... It doesn’t much matter, he’s faster and smarter, but we have an agreement, Stanley and me.

I don’t usually leave the bedroom anyway so he’s got the run of the place. He’s free to have his friends over for drinks or his girlfriend for dinner. I only come out if the music is too loud, otherwise I just read till I sleep.

Is that apple pie? I think I smell apple pie! It’s coming up through the vents. He must be having a bake off or some event for his son’s school. Stanley has a son from a previous marriage named Toby. He’s graduating with honors this year. Stanley car has a bumper sticker that reads: "My son is an honor student at James Polk High!" He’s a bright little mouse. Just like his dad.

My son hasn’t called me in months and I ride a bicycle.

Stanley went out with my ex wife for dinner tonight. He’s met her a few times when she dropped off my prescriptions. That Stanley sure is a charmer. He’s a rat. They’re taking my boy and toby to Chuck E Cheeses’. Stanley says he knows someone that works there.

Before they went out, he offered me coffee. He wants to keep up appearances and show good faith. We made an agreement, Stanley and me. He’d have my boy call me after dinner. He said that he’d do it. Stanley’s a rat, but he knows what my boy means to me.

They left around 9 in Doris’ new car. Red and Blue with all leather seating. That was the last I’ve seen them. We had an agreement, Stanley and me.

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